Someone Get Me on the Phone with the T.V Show Horders

So we have this shed.

Time Machines DO exist!

It’s not ours per se, it’s my father-in-law’s.

I always wondered what was in it.

Turns out there are MANY MANY things that I wish werent in there.

Apparently, my f-i-l is a secret horder.

The hording may be situated into a single shed, but YOU BETTER BELIEVE there is some serious hording happening.

For example, when we  informed my fil that we were moving to Israel, he insisted we not bring anything with us. “I have EVERYTHING you will need” he said on the phone.

 It sounded so nice and comforting.

That is until my husband turned to me and said, “You know he means furniture from the 70’s”

 I thought he was exaggerating.

I’m glad I believed him and am having my own furniture and belongings shipped to us.

If couches could talk

 When my husband told his father that we needed to go buy some cutlery, my fil proceeded to take him into the shed. My bewildered husband came back with a plastic bag full of forks, knives, spoons and the such. I asked him what was wrong, and as he pulled out a fork, he asks me how old I thought the no longer shiny utensil was.

“Ten years old”? I answered.

“No. My mother bought these when I was a kid”.

 His mother has been dead for over 20 years.

I literally feel as though I am in a time warp in this apartment.

The kitchen is 70’s chic:


And did I mention this is the clock that my f-i-l gave us from the magical shed after we said we needed to buy a clock?

Oh no he didn't

Oh yes he did.

I see potential in this time warp of an apartment, I really do… considering this is the view from my kitchen window:


A view like that is something a city girl like me, truly appreciates.

Now bring on the garbage truck!


21 thoughts on “Someone Get Me on the Phone with the T.V Show Horders

  1. nancie

    SO FUNNY!!! i hope YOUR own things get there soon!!!
    i can’t wait to hear more stories from you of all your adventures so far.
    i’m one of the one’s who found your site through heather’s…and one who spent an entire weekend reading through ALL your old posts…and also one who fell in love with..and can relate to you and your family on so many levels…!!!
    i’m just so ready to hear more about your new life!

  2. Mara

    I found your blog through Heather’s. I read your entire blog (clearly I have way a lot of free time) and loved the photos of you as a kid…..yeah, my hair looked exactly the same way. At least you didn’t have a unibrow. I would send you some pics of my childhood Afro, but no one should be traumatized like that……
    You have beautiful babies, G-d bless your family.

  3. Erin Woods

    He’ll let you redecorate, right? Hehe. And I’m with edenland. On a few things anyway. Okay, mostly just the kitchen. The kitchen definitely rocks. Does that make me weird? Oh well, I like it. (Although if it was my kitchen, I might be singing a different tune.) *wink*

    Hope you guys are adjusting well to your new home. Take care!

  4. Bella

    Priceless photos! I must know what else is in that shed!! But really, I kinda like that kitchen! How are the girls adjusting??

  5. Nearlydawn

    I have to say – I do like the tile in the kitchen… yes it is WAY out of my personal comfort zone, but think that’s what I’m liking about it. 🙂 Too bad you don’t have one of those 60’s metal dining sets in yellow or orange, that would be PERFECT! I’ll be he has one in THE SHED o’ Stuff! Ask him!! Ha!

    Seriously, you could do worse… you at least have something to sit on. My hubby and I couldn’t finish moving for a few weeks after we bought our house, but had to be out of our old house. It wasn’t easy living with NO furniture – even butt-arse ugly would have been better.

    I’m thinking you have some good potential there – go with that freaky 70’s thing!

  6. Amber

    Oh my gosh, that is SO funny….made me lol!! The apt. definitely has potential and the view is AMAZING!! I hope that everything is going well so far….despite the 70’s throwback 🙂

  7. heather...

    HA HA HA HA that stuff is so ugly! I can’t wait to see the place with your own stuff in it.

    What does the clock say?

    BTW this opposite time zone thing is NOT. WORKING. FOR. ME.

    1. geminigirl64 Post author

      Ha! it says the name of the singer and that he is a yemenite artist with his phone number. oh yeah.

      1. Joie


        Why can’t Johnny Depp do that? Gah!

  8. Nima

    Have fun =)
    My Mom is a hoarder too..I still find the most funny things in our store..It is fun discovering it, as long as I do not have to USE those things..I just look, laugh, make some jokes and put it back..
    And yes I am one of the new readers through Heather’s blog!! And best of luck for the new phase..

  9. Kir

    yep, the couch…has to GO!!!!!!!!!!!!! Holy smokes…GO…

    but the kitchen and the view definately have potential for sure…except the clock…send it packing with the couch.

    I see you have some things that will keep you busy for a few weeks. 🙂 Hope the girls are enjoying their new home too.


  10. peach

    I’m new to your blog and would love to hear more about why you relocated to Israel…I’m in the middle of a relocation myself and always love to hear other peoples stories…

  11. Cara

    Wowza! Holy 70s Batman! The kitchen IS kinda spunky, tho…I could work wit it…Hope your furniture arrives soon and you may just want to shop for a new (non-creepish) clock…lol. Can’t wait to hear more on your new adventures!

  12. Robin from Israel

    Oh my god, just substitute those ovals for black diamond inserts and you’ve got my old kitchen! The kitchen I hated from the very second we bought our place, the same kitchen which took me 10 lonnnnng years to replace with the oh so much lovelier one you see in my blog header. Gives me the shivers just thinking about it. Gaah! The clock and the couches don’t even bear thinking about.

    My photography is available for purchase – visit Around the Island Photography and bring home something beautiful today!

  13. rachel

    My mil is exactly the same! (Child of a Holocaust survivor, obvs). Its her worst fear that we should buy something when she can “help”. I’m not even pregnant and she is already in the process of “cleaning” Danny’s baby furniture. Smh. On the other hand, they will always take things that you are too lazy to get to charity. Or the landfill. Miss you Maya!

  14. Chas

    I actually like that kitchen…kind of cool.

    There’s something weird and unsettling for me thinking of you waking up almost every day of your life in NYC, looking out the window and seeing the streets lined with buildings and pavement, and then suddenly waking up, looking out the window and seeing what’s in that picture. I’m not sure why it feels that way for me…I think I’m thinking of how I might feel if I were you…I think I’d require an adjustment period.


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