My girls started their first day of daycare today.
Up until this point my mother and my husband (when he wasnt in school) have been their primary caretakers during the day. I work a full-time job and am out of my house for about 11 hours a day (someone has to make the money- sense the animosity?).
In March, my husband and I decided that come the Fall we would put the girls in daycare. My mother has officially lost her patience and I have lost my patience for her (Case in point- last week we had a fight and she called me an idiot in front of my girls.. she has zero respect for me as a parent).
Even though I know that they receive an abundance of love from my mother (she is a way better grandparent than a mother) they need to be in a setting with other children. They need to learn. They need to play. They need to be able to touch whatever they want without hearing “Don’t touch that!”
So like I was saying, back in March I decided to start calling daycare centers around my parts. Everyone pretty much told me that they were booked up for the fall! I was in complete and utter shock. This was 6 months before school started. I guess I didnt know I needed to sign the girls up while they were in the womb.
A friend told me about the daycare that she sends her son to. She said he loved it. So I took the day off and my husband and I had two appointments at two separate places.
The first place (the referral) we walked into was a huge Jewish community center that had its own daycare facility. We met with the director and I was in love. She is warm, and caring and you could tell that she REALLY does care for each of those kids. The times are from 9am-4pm mon-thur and 9-12 on friday. She told me that she would give me a discount for both of the girls (I did suggest the buy one get one free method but she laughed).
As I was leaving the place and was about to head for the second destination- I turned to my husband and said that I didn’t want to look at the second place- that my motherly instincts were telling me that this was the place for them.
He agreed and we went back in to sign the paperwork.
I love the fact that it is a Jewish daycare center- as my religion plays a big part in who I am. I went to private school from the age of 3-18 and I appreciated it. Sure, I missed out on some cool things like Halloween (not a Jewish holiday so it was frowned on), prom, dances, etc.. but what I gained was a sense of community and deep roots.
Orientation for the girls was yesterday morning. I took the day off of work and my mother and I took the girls in. I thought they would freak out, but they were loving it! I could have left them there and they wouldnt have noticed.
That felt good- it means that we have been doing a good job keeping them confident and independent.
My husband dropped them off this morning and he said they went right into the room and started playing with the other kids. They were doing well! When he was down the hall he heard Neve crying “Daddy” and he said it broke his heart.
He had a hard time leaving them.
Personally, I am OK with it. Everyone has been asking me if I cried like a baby this morning. I mean, I didnt sleep well last night (but not sure that it had anything to do with the first day of daycare).
I know this is the best place for them. I know that they will learn and grow every day. They will forge friendships… with children other than their twin.
So no, I did not cry.
No, I am not sad.
More than anything, I am excited for them to brighten their horizons to learn more about the world…
I wish I had a crystal ball two years ago… all of my fears, all of my worries… my high risk pregnancy, my pre- term labor, their early births…. the fears…the sleepless nights…
I wish I would have known…