Israel & Sammy

Seriously people. I am starting to get offended. I know you re out there… I see it on my site feed. But only 5 of you comment. What’s up with that ladies and gents?

Take the time to say hi! I would love to read your blogs as well if you have one.

BTW- My girls are 7 months old today people. How insane is that?

Moving on.

Let’s discuss lawn ornaments.

Yes, those little gnomes or rabbits made of stone that bring a smile to someones face as they pass your house.

Hey there pipe smoking gnome. What LSD induced stories do you have to share with us today?





I admit, I think they’re cute.

But why in GD’s name would anyone do this to their lawn??!:

Crazy ax murder waiting to greet you outside your home:

“Hi”



You too can have an African Safari in your own backyard! A ghostly figure riding on a buggy going nowhere



“Sammy” Meet the VERY PROUD owner of this fine spectacle (and my husband’s uncle):



He loves his lawn ornaments so much, he even names them. Oh wait, he also changes their clothes and shoes yearly. Yes people- they have a change of clothes. You would think this man is deranged, but actually he is perfectly normal. Imagine seeing these figures in middle of the night?

My husband, the girls, and I were invited to a BBQ at his aunt’s house (in our honor) and this is what we saw upon arrival. I could not stop laughing. I took out my camera to snap pictures so that I could share this wonderful site with all of you. My husband knew why I was snapping the pics and he laughed.

My husband and Dan:



I had to get in on the fun, here I am giving Dan bunny ears. Hope that doesn’t make him mad- you wont like him when he’s mad.

We had a nice time at the BBQ. His aunt invited my husband’s father and his family, and two more sets of aunt and uncles.

Oh but wait, the crazy sets in soon.

His aunt has a newly married son who lives in his parent’s house (never a good idea) with his wife. I met his wife (Sharon) maybe once prior to this visit.

A week prior to this BBQ, Sharon and I met and she seemed sane. That is until she became OBSESSED with my children. She took out her camera phone and continued to snap pictures of my children non-stop. Now, this would be OK for my husband’s 13 year old sister to do since she is their aunt and is a tween. But this 26 yo woman would not stop. She wanted to hold them all the time. OK, I get it. When you don’t have kids and see a cute baby/babies you want to hold them. But even me as a woman who had problems having children would NEVER have snapped so many pictures of my husband’s cousin’s babies. I just think that’s a little off- esp since I have never met you before. Then she kept looking at the pictures.

Now, the following week at the BBQ, she was there and told me to come to her room. I proceeded to follow her and she had a bag with a wrapped present in it. Now instead of her handing it to me to open, she actually opened the gift wrapping herself! Umm.. ok crazy.

She had purchased 4 new outfits for them. FUGLY is not the word. It made them look like psychedelic circus clowns. Here the girls are modeling two of the outfits:

Here Neve is modeling her neon green ruffle top (I don’t think ruffle and neon green should ever be muttered in the same sentence) & Bell bottom bright blue pants:

In the same collection, here is Soleil modeling her neon orange ruffled shirt, with her hot pink bell bottom pants:



Mom, help me get this off:



Why must you torment us with these outfits?Of course, I told her that I LOVED the outfits. I hope she doesn’t run into my sister-in-law soon (since I handed these and many more fugly clothes that I received from people as gifts off to my sis-in-law who loved them). Sharon even told me that she was showing everyone she knows the pics of my kids and was counting down the days to see them. OK Crazy.

Before we left, Sharon (after snapping many more pics of my girls) said “OMG, I am going to miss them so much. I cant believe we wont see them for years!” I tried to console her and said, well there are another set of twins (my brother-in-law) for you to go gaga over (no pun intended). She then looked at me with a crazed look in her eye and said “No, they will NEVER be as special as these girls”.

I mean, what can you say to that? You just nod your head and smile when you’re in crazy lawn ornament land.

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14 thoughts on “Israel & Sammy

  1. Rachel Inbar

    Gosh, that is a weird story… (the Sharon one) and the lawn ornaments. Um. Like… maybe it’s not so bad to live across the ocean 😉

    Your girls are adorable despite the outfits 🙂

    BTW, you look so much like my Israeli SIL sometimes that I’ve actually sent my mom to check out your blog (she agrees).

    Reply
  2. Here I am

    Yikes- she is scary. Hopefully she means well though : )
    So that is crazy that you’re from Bet Dagan too! I will have to tell my mom. I don’t know the Rabbi that you mention but maybe she does. As you might have seen in some of my photos, I am way too light skinned to be Yemenite- we aren’t but like I said my mom loved growing up there with all her Yemenite neighbors. Btw- her family left Israel when she was 13(long time ago!) but she and my dad only speak Hebrew at home and we grew up more Israeli than American… Amazing who you can meet in blogland! (btw my name is Sharon too– but don’t hold that against me! : )

    Reply
  3. Mike

    Great, very funny post! One of the things I laughed hardest at though was one of your typos. You said that crazy gnome had LCD inspired stories to share…I think you meant LSD inspired. Although their are some crazy things you can watch these days on an LCD monitor…

    Reply
  4. Mike

    I forgot to mention that your cousin in law better start wearing a condom ASAP if he doesn’t want to be a father in say, nine months after the next time he has sex with his wife. This crazy lady has baby fever!

    Reply
  5. K J and the kids

    I love that she was so into your girls. CRAZY as hell but loved them still.
    That is some creepy ass lawn ornaments. 🙂
    The pictures don’t do them justice because I think they are cute. Maybe your girls can pull anything off.

    Reply
  6. Heather

    I like how Mike laughed at a typo and then has one in his comment. That’s so him!

    Anyway, she is right – your girls are MUCH more special than the other twins. I mean, are the other twins featured on a clothing website? I think not?

    Reply
  7. Pillarr1

    Hi there! I have not posted since June of last year! I follow your blog everyday! I was preganant through IVF at the same time as you – my daughter was born 1/24/08. I promise to comment from now on. That is too funny about the stalker relative and the clothes she gave your girls. That whole story was kinda creepy. I think the girls look cute in anything they wear – even bell bottoms!

    Reply
  8. feistycali

    Hello, lurker here 🙂 Been stalking you for the last few months, I won’t hid in the shadows anymore! Love hearing your success story, you have an adorable family!!

    Reply
  9. Chas

    That was pretty weird from beginning to end…starting with the lawn ornaments. I’m not sure that those full sized men mannequin things would even be classified as lawn ornaments …they look like something someone might put in their lawn around Halloween to scare kids.

    Poor Sharon…she’s probably completely clueless as to how her behavior is perceived. At least she was generous and sweet…and you don’t have to see her for a few more years :).

    Reply
  10. chris

    Love the lawn decorations…My children actually wanted to have lawn decorations that will freak people out…

    Reply
  11. Hope

    Ok I am de-lurking. She sounds CRAZY. Those outfits are kinda crazy as well. I will try to comment more often.

    Reply
  12. Topcat

    Oh, Maya. Seriously …. I love how your husband started laughing because he knew you were gonna post the pics on your blog.

    And I love how you take pics of your girls dressed in FUGLY clothes, just to show us all how fugly they are!!! (The clothes, not the girls, of course!!)

    xoxoxoxxox

    Reply

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