I had decided that I was not going to blog about riders on the public transportation system here in New York City, but yesterday’s incident took the cake!
Picture it Sisely 1904….
OK, not really- yesterday 6:30pm. I was on the bus coming home (after a 45 minute subway ride). I was sitting down and one stop away from home. I held on the the bars to my side to help me get up so that I could be prepared for the stop. As I was standing waiting for the bus to move, a woman jabs her elbow into my side. She doesn’t look at me so I figure it was a mistake. I was wrong.
I didn’t say anything. Suddenly she looks at the woman who is sitting in front of her and says “would you say you were sorry if you pushed someone?”. Then she proceeded to point in my direction (as I was directly behind her) and said “well, that woman pushed me and didn’t say anything”- referring to me!
What? I pushed her? I absolutely did not feel as though I had pushed her at all because if I would have I would have apologized!
I look at her in shock, after realizing the elbow jab was intentional, and said to her “So you jabbed your elbow into a pregnant woman on purpose?”. She looks back, then to my stomach, realizing that I was pregnant. Still no apologies.
Crazy/ Bitch Woman: “Well, you pushed me”.
Me: “I didn’t feel as though I had pushed you- have you ever been pregnant before?”
Crazy/ Bitch Woman: “That doesn’t matter”
Me: “Well it does because when you are pregnant your center of gravity is off- I didn’t even feel as though I had pushed you. I cant believe you would intentionally jab your elbow into a woman who is pregnant with multiples.”- meanwhile all this is happening with a crowd around us.
Crazy/ Bitch Woman: “Well, I got up for a pregnant woman on the subway today (as if she is now a saint)
you should apologize to me”
Me: After jabbing me? You are truly a classy woman. A class act
Crazy: “Well, at least I am not like you” (wonder what that meant)
Me: “Thanks GD for that”
I proceeded to get off the bus. I told my husband the story as I got home and started crying. I mean, how could someone be so mean, and jab me! I mean if I did push her- which I didn’t even feel- it was not a major push where someone would notice. And does that justify jabbing me in my side with her elbow? What kind of people are out there these days?
On Friday I went to visit my best friend Franny at her mother’s house (since she was there for the holidays) . Franny has a one and a half year old boy, and a 4.5 month old girl. When her son was born we started TTC. But as the months progressed, and I wasn’t getting pregnant being around her was hard. What was harder- her getting pregnant again 3 months after he was born (she pulled a Britney). She held herself in such a wonderful way- trying to never ever make me feel bad. Always supporting me- through my surgery, unsuccessful rounds of chlomid, and ivf. When her daughter was born (May 11th) I found out I was pregnant. It was such a nice surprise that it turned out that way.
Anyway, her whole family was there and let me tell you there are a gaggle of children. Her brother has 4, Franny has the 2, and her sister has 5. No wonder I hated going there prior to my pregnancy.
So my point:
As I walked in, I saw a double stroller. In it lay Franny’s daughter and to her right, Franny’s nephew (around the same age 4 months). They both looked up from the stroller and smiled at me. My heart melted. That is what I will be staring at in a few months from now (GD willing). Two little babies smiling at me. I almost cried.
I know that it will be hard. I know. I am not convincing myself otherwise. But just seeing those two little smiling faces made me know that it is all well worth it. I am tearing up just thinking about it.
So Franny goes on to tell me that she thinks she may be pregnant again- yup. She stopped breastfeeding two months ago and still has not gotten her period. She was about to start BCP, but needed the go ahead by her Rabbi (In Judaism, you need to get approval to take BC). He did give it to her, but she couldn’t start taking them until she gets her period- which is a no show.
She was stressed out. She has these two little babies at home, is currently living in a tiny overcrowded apt while her new home gets renovated, and is a stay at home mom. Her husband does absolutely nothing to help her- when I say nothing, I mean nothing. He hardly agrees to change a diaper. He thinks its her job to do it all, and GD forgive me but sometimes I want to smack him. The last thing she needs is another crying baby.
I went and bought her a pregnancy test and she took it. It was negative. I was so relieved for her. Its funny how one woman’s negative poas is another woman’s salvation. She was happy. When I said that she must be relived, her husband (from the other room mind you) shouts “why should she be relieved?”. He doesn’t care to have more children. Of course he doesn’t- the man does nothing to help.
Those are my little stories for the day.
On a side note, everyone says that I don’t look big enough to be carrying twins. Do we need to look a certain way? But I assure them to give me a few more weeks before “I pop”.
Oh, and I am apparently the talk of the office.
I just ran into another pregnant woman on my office floor. We were both waiting for the elevator and we started talking. She said she is expecting a girl. I said I was expecting two. She said “Oh, your the one who’s having twins- Ive heard about you!”… not the first time Ive heard that.
Plus- I have not yet handed out Rockin’ Blogger awards as of yet, since I have been nominated by TopCat a few weeks ago. Here goes:
Topcat– She is on the top of my list. This woman is a recovering drug addict and alcoholic and counsels other women who are addicts. Topcat is married to a wonderful man and has a little boy (who was conceived naturally). When she decided to have more children, she was faced with secondary infertility. Along with that no one believed- including herself- that her husband had any swimmers left (after a bout with cancer and chemo). Boy was she wrong! After just undergoing ivf- TC is now pregnant!
Karen from Role Playing with Kids– K is a mother of an adorable little girl and twin boys. Karen was the first to predict that I was pregnant with twins when I was recounting my first pregnancy symptoms. Since she has gone on to give me so much valuable advice. K has been with her partner for 10 years (which is more than I can say for half the hetero couples that I know) and is a happy stay at home mom. I admire Karen for being true to herself and proving to all the nay-sayers that families come in all shapes!
Stacie from here storkey storkey– Stacie is currently pregnant with twin boys after going through IVF. She is my due date partner as we both underwent IVF at the same time, and both ended up with two little ones. Stacie is now on bed rest- which she finds difficult- but knows that it is all for a beautiful cause. She and her husband were high school sweethearts and will no doubt have a beautiful family.
Chas from Sugar & Ice– Chastity has a beautiful little girl! Her daughter was conceived through IVF . Chas is a teacher by trade but just left her job to be a stay at home mom (which is a lot harder than any other job). Chas always has amazing pictures to share and seems like such a happy young mother! I wish she lived closer!
Last but certainly not least:
Kirsten from Blonde Ambitions– Kirsten had two beautiful baby girls not long ago. Unfortunately they were born two months too early so the little ladies had to stay in the NICU for a while. Kirsten is just starting to find her groove as a first time mommy and has a wonderful family that surrounds her.
So many more ladies that deserve awards- but I do have to get back to work!