Let me introduce myself to you all. At first this blog was just for my amusement, and I never shared it with anyone. So I wrote about random things.
Now I am sticking to writing about my IVF experience.
My name is Maya, I am 25 ( next month 26) with one remaining ovary and fallopian tube ( right side had to be removed due to large cysts 3 years ago). I have been TTC for over a year now, and realized that my former surgeries may be the cause of my infertility. So off to the Fertility Specialist we went.
After many many tests, the answer was pretty much a question mark. They *believe* that my problems stem from scar tissue that is in my uterus- they formed after my surgeries. They are causing a mechanical problem in the conception process. I have eggs, he has sperm- yet for some reason they are not meeting.
So began the shots last month. They retrieved 20 eggs- not so bad for one ovary ( my Doctor called me Super girl). 19 fertilized, but only 8 made it. Lucky Number 8.
The 2 they implanted were grade AB- Day 5 transfer, which they assured me were really good, and the others off to the freezer.
I had my transfer last week Wednesday ( May 2ND, 2007).
And here I wait.
The waiting is killing me, but it’s ok. Yesterday I gave in and bought a POAS. I know that I shouldn’t have bec the trigger shot might still be in my system ( yesterday was 12 days since my trigger shot) but I had to. I needed to know.
I peed, in the afternoon in my office bathroom.
One dark, and the other faint, but somewhat visible. I have never seen 2 lines before. So I stared in excitement. Could I be pregnant? I quickly ran to call my husband- he was not happy. He asked why I would do this to myself when I know that it might be a false positive.
Why I would do this? Hmmm…. let’s see.
Maybe because I have been through so much hell these past few years- First losing a tube at 22, then an ovary at 23, and to top it all off having fertility problems for this long year. Yes, I may be a few short days away from knowing but the waiting is hell. It just is. As you all can testify.
So I tried to remain positive- until 4 hours ago when I saw brown as I wiped. TMI maybe. But, I have to share. So is this the onset of my impending period? Maybe. Is it attachment bleeding- who knows. All I know is my positive attitude went downhill.
I have been googling “IVF Spotting” and reading everything that comes up. No definitive answer. None to get me through the next 3 days.
I called the IVF nurses. of course I get the one on the line that is the least friendliest. Where is my super ivf nurse Rosa? Anyway, she proceeds to tell me not to worry, it might be normal, but to come in on Friday anyway. Wow- how positive sounding ( Do you sense my sarcasm?).
I’m in limbo. I know that I should look on the bright side and say that I am lucky enough to still have frozen embryos- when I have friends who don’t. But this entire process is hard to swallow. So 3 days left and counting……